“Daniel 3:24–25 (NIV) — 24 Then King Nebuchadnezzar leaped to his feet in amazement and asked his advisers, “Weren’t there three men that we tied up and threw into the fire?” They replied, “Certainly, Your Majesty.” 25 He said, “Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods.”
Leslee and I recently got hit with some pretty shocking news regarding Ela's condition. In fact, I would go as far as saying that this was the hardest news I've received since I heard the words: "your daughter has HLHS and this is what that means." See, after hearing about HLHS before Ela was born, we had a bit of time to adjust to the new "normal" since we got acquainted with what her journey would be like: She'd be born, but we wouldn't be able to enjoy her long because she would have to be prepped for her first open heart surgery. Six months later she would have another open-heart surgery and a third surgery anytime between the ages of 2 and 4. Through those years there would be challenges with feeding, with oxygen, with mobility, with development; she would have to be on a number of meds, and she would, potentially, not live into adulthood. This would be Ela's "normal"...got it.
Now I believe the Scriptures teach that God has a decree, a plan that he made before the foundations of the world (Isa. 14:24). This is a plan that He is sovereign over, it is a plan that is unchanging, and it is a plan that is all-encompassing (Lam. 3:37–38). This means that, yes, it is a plan that not only includes the death of His son (1 Pet. 1:20), but also includes premature deaths, car wrecks, cancers, and all the other evil that comes as a result of sin and Satan's activities. This plan includes Ela's journey and the "normal" to which we had to adjust.
I think hearing that Ela wasn't a candidate for the third open heart surgery blindsided us and was very discouraging because we had become relaxed with man's plans...with doctor's plans...with other HLHS and HRHS journeys. And in our relaxing, the phrase "if the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that" (Jas. 4:15) kind of took the back seat. Losing perspective doesn't mean that hard news isn't hard or that grief isn't real for the believer though. Losing perspective doesn't eliminate the fact that sin and its effects on fallen creation is still a very ugly sight to behold. But it does mean that we need to be intentional, and work hard at not getting too comfortable with our own plans, because they will be derailed if they don't coincide with God's plans.
With this warning in mind, let me reiterate that God is good. He didn't have to do this, but in His decree, He included walking through hardships with us to strengthen us and encourage us with His presence (as in the narrative of the fiery furnace). "I will not forsake you" is a phrase that constantly comes out of God's mouth in the OT and it is a phrase that we also hear from Jesus' mouth in the NT as well: "I will not leave you as orphans" (Jn. 14:18), "I will NEVER leave you" (Heb. 13:5). These are promises in which we can find hope.
God is good in that He promises us His presence--through the good and the bad. But His goodness can also be appreciated in more practical and concrete ways as well. For example, there is an organization named "Lester's Feet" that helps families with needy children like Ela. After corresponding with Leslee for a bit, they informed her that they had decided to pay 3 months of our mortgage to help with finances. Thank you, Lord. IBC and others have also been a constant source of encouragement. Prayers and monetary help for Ela's medical needs have come our way in a consistent manner. This week, we also had a good hospital visit in Philly. We saw 5 doctors (GI, Nephro, Uro, Neuro, and Cardio), four of whom hadn't seen Ela in about a year and who were thrilled to see how good she looked and how much she had grown and developed. Since this is getting long, I will let Leslee give you the details in a future post.
God is good. Ela won't have to have another cath for another 3 months, which means that we will be back to CHOP in December to check on her heart pressures. Until then, we rejoice in God's goodness, we remind ourselves that man's plans are subject to His plans, and we find hope in knowing that whatever "fiery furnace" awaits us, He will walk through it with us.